When someone says “I’m getting a divorce,” what images and thoughts pop-up in your mind? A bloody war? Anger? Revenge? Pain? Lot’s of money spent on lawyers? I’m sure there are many more questions that you think about.

I believe that divorce can be obtained amicably, and that is why I focus and dedicate myself to helping couples obtain a PeacefulSplit® divorce. Let me be clear: peaceful doesn’t mean or equate with painless. Divorce is a painful process. Divorce hurts, even in the best of circumstances. Men get hurt. Women get hurt. Children get hurt. But, the level of pain and hurt is not absolute and, with the right process and professional help, can be minimized.

Untangling two lives and planning for the future not only consumes a huge amount of emotional energy, but it also takes a high financial toll. What do you envision the process of ending your marriage should be? Fighting? Pain? Vengeance? Or do you wish and desire you divorce to encompass mutual respect, peaceful negotiations and efficiency? If you choose the former, then mediation is not for you! If you choose the latter, then read on and discover how Eric can help you achieve your peaceful and desirable goals.

Traditional Divorce:

In the traditional model of divorce, one spouse files papers in court beginning the divorce process. He or she may choose to hire a lawyer to represent them. The Summons and Petition will be served by the Sheriff upon the other spouse, who will then choose to respond "pro se" (meaning without a lawyer) or by hiring a lawyer. Either way, one thing is inevitable: the battle has begun. How it will end is anyone’s guess, but it often ends with no real winners and plenty of losers.

Do you enjoy gambling at a casino? Do you often buy lottery tickets? Do you believe you will be the rare person to win the Lotto or Powerball? 

PeacefultSplit® Divorce Mediation

PEACEFULSPLIT® Divorce Mediation provides you and your spouse with a safe and calm environment designed to maintain dignity, respect, and control over the divorce process.

Mediation using Eric's PeacefulSplit® process focuses on preventing the pain and damage typically associated with divorce. You can get through this challenging time in your lives and the lives of your children by focusing on a negotiated settlement via mediation - as opposed to the war of a court battle!

The biggest difference with divorce mediation over traditional divorce is ALL of the Power and Control to make decisions concerning the division of property, money, insurance, taxes, cars, investments, pensions, 401(k)s, houses, etc. rests with BOTH SPOUSES. 

During the mediation sessions, Eric will bring up numerous topics dealing with finances and minor children (if applicable) and each such topic will be discussed at length by both spouses.
With Eric's guidance and assistance, a calm, respectful, and effective negotiation will take place with the goal of finding an equitable and fair resolution of each and every issue. Of course, some topics will be easier than others to find common ground. That is to be expected!

Step-By-Step Mediation Process

1. Each spouse voluntarily decides to proceed with a PeacefulSplit® Divorce Mediation.
2. Eric sends each spouse his engagement agreement to e-sign retaining his services as the agreed upon mediator.
3. Once signed, Eric contacts them to schedule the first mediation session.
   
4. Eric sends each spouse a few online fillable forms to complete. The forms summarize financial assets/debts, and shows current income so that child support (if there are minor children) can be calculated.
5. The 1st session is held for a maximum of 3-hours.
6. The session's held In-Person (Boca Raton) or by Zoom (video conference).
7. Eric guides the spouses through a relaxed, effective, and peaceful discussion and negotiation to resolve all issues.
   
8. If all issues are not fully resolved in the first session, then a second session will be scheduled at the spouses' request.
9. As the mediator, Eric (who is also an attorney with over 28 years of experience) drafts the applicable settlement agreement(s) (i.e., Mediated Marital Settlement Agreement and, if there are minor children, a Parenting Plan and Child Support Exhibits).
10. The spouses review the draft agreement(s) and provide Eric with any  requested and agreed upon edits/revisions/changes, or approval.
11. Eric redrafts the agreement(s) and resends to the spouses for review and further edits/revisions/changes, or final approval.
12. Once both spouses approve the draft agreement(s), Eric sends the final version of the settlement agreement(s) with post-mediation guidance.
13. The spouses decide when to sign, date, and notarize the agreement(s) - which then become effective and binding on them.
14. The spouses, on their own, can complete the Court's fill-in-the-blank uncontested divorce packet of forms, and then file those with the Court ($409 filing fee). They also provide the court with copies of the signed and notarized settlement agreement(s).
15. After a final hearing (usually held by Zoom) and approval, the Court grants the divorce, incorporating the settlement agreement(s) into the final divorce decree (on average 1-2 months after filing date). 

My role as mediator is to guide both spouses to a point where they can accept what I refer to as the “Both/And.” That is, the understanding that divorce does not and should not mean that “either” Spouse 1 got the better of the other spouse “or” Spouse 2 walked away the winner. When both feel that their divorce settlement is acceptable and they are ready to move on with their lives, I know that my job was successful.

Eric combines his unique knowledge, experience, and skills as a Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Mediator, a lawyer with over 28 years experience, and as a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, to help couples successfully negotiate resolutions to all of the various and complex issues in divorce.

What is a PeacefulSplit® divorce mediation?

 Divorce mediation is a voluntary, non-adversarial process in which you and your spouse are guided through the process of negotiating issues necessary to file for a divorce. The process begins by each of you reviewing and signing an Engagement  Agreement (which I will send to you and your spouse once you let me know you both want to proceed with mediation). This Agreement is the document by which you hire me to serve as the mediator for your divorce. I will then work with both of you to schedule the first session (either In-Person in Boca Raton or via Zoom video conference). At the first session, I review the topics that we will discuss, explain the process in detail, answer any of your preliminary questions, and then we begin to work on areas of basic agreement. We then resolve as many issues as possible first before moving onto to more sensitive issues or issues of significant disagreement. When we resolve one issue we move onto the next. Most importantly, you and your spouse maintain total control of all decisions.

What documents are prepared?

  Upon conclusion of the mediation session(s), I will draft either one or both of the following documents for you to file with your uncontested divorce court forms: (i) Mediated Marital Settlement Agreement – which is an agreement that details how the two of you will divide-up your assets (things you own) and your debts (amounts you owe to others); and (ii) Parenting Plan – which is an agreement that details how the two of you will parent your child(ren) after the divorce (e.g., visitation, parental responsibility, educational and health decisions). Child Support will also be calculated. In a PeacefulSplit® mediation, the settlement document(s) that I draft for you are personalized and customized to meet your specific situation, relationship, children, needs and desires.

How quickly can mediation be scheduled?

 As a private mediator, I work for the both of you. I make myself available to meet your schedules, including weekends. You let me know when you both are ready; I will be too. I generally am able to schedule within 1-2 weeks.

What is Eric's background and experience?

 Eric B. Epstein is a Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Mediator, Licensed Attorney in both Florida and New York, and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. I have been practicing law for over 28 years. In 1991,  I graduated from the NYU Stern School of Business with a Bachelor of Science degree in Finance, and then in 1994 received my law degree from the Benjamin N. Cardozo School of Law in New York City. In 2018, I earned a master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from Nova Southeastern University. I have been an active member of  the New York Bar since 1995 and the Florida Bar since 2010. Eric does not represent individuals in the divorce process. His focus is strictly on helping couples mediate their divorce-related issues and is dedicated to working in a peaceful and non-adversarial manner. I believe that more can be accomplished from looking at both sides of an issue and understanding each person’s reality given the context of their behavior and position. I am very patient and use my diverse education and training to meet my clients’ needs during this challenging time in their lives.

What makes you different from other mediators?

  I will never represent to be “better” than any other mediator. However, if you do your due diligence and speak with different mediators, I think you will conclude that my background, experience, and skillset is uniquely designed to help couples effectively, calmly, and peacefully navigate the divorce process. As a lawyer with over 28 years of experience and as a Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Mediator, I possess knowledge and skills from a legal perspective to help clients constructively resolve complicated and often contentious issues. As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, I possess knowledge and skills from a psychological and emotional perspective to assist couples to peacefully and sensitively manage their emotional reactions during the mediation sessions. When you are choosing a mediator, think about not only who has the knowledge and experience to help you resolve issues during mediation sessions, but who also possesses the skills to draft the various settlement agreement(s) to put into writing the issues resolved during mediation My settlement agreement(s) (the Marital Settlement Agreement and/or the Parenting Plan) are, on average, over 35 pages long. They are personalized to your specific needs and situations. They are not just boilerplate, cookie-cutter documents. No two agreements that I ever draft is the same – because each divorcing couple is not the same. Remember, many people become Certified Family Law Mediators. However, not every mediator  possesses the same  background, experience, knowledge, and skillset. I do not represent any individual clients in the divorce process. I do not litigate divorces. I do not represent one spouse against the other spouse. I do not represent parents in custody cases. Instead, I dedicate my career, time, and energy to one goal: helping couples peacefully divorce!

How long is the mediation process & sessions?

  The reality of the mediation process is that the length of time to complete the process is in your hands. Most couples who contact me end-up having their first mediation session within a couple of weeks; others have more challenging schedules, and it takes longer to have the first session. I allocate up to 3-hours for the first session. From my experience doing hundreds of mediations, the vast majority are resolved in our first session – even when issues concerning minor children are discussed and negotiated. By combining my extensive background and experience as an attorney, mediator, and psychotherapist, I can guide couples through the mediation sessions and avoid them unnecessarily being pulled off-course. After the issues are resolved, I then draft the appropriate settlement agreement(s). At that point, the timing is again in your hands. Some couples take a long time to review and request changes to the agreement(s); other couple are very proactive and responsive with changes or approvals. Either way, my goal is to ensure that I am always efficient and responsive to my clients and their needs, and that I am never the cause of any delays in the mediation process.

Do we have to go to Court?

  One of the main benefits of engaging in private mediation is to avoid involving the Court system until the end of the divorce process. Working together in a safe and neutral environment, I help you both to arrive at negotiated settlement of all issues that are then written into a Mediated Marital Settlement Agreement. Similarly, if you have minor children, I help you both negotiate terms and conditions that are then written into a Parenting Plan. Only when you have both reached settlement on the issues and have executed the Agreement(s), will you then decide when to prepare and file the applicable Uncontested Divorce forms with the appropriate court and appear thereafter before a Judge to formalize and approve the divorce at a final hearing (usually held by Zoom).

Do we both have to be involved to mediate?

 Yes. Mediation is voluntary and requires the involvement and agreement of both parties. I only do mediations where both spouses feel safe and comfortable being in the same room together. Of course, if we do the mediation via video conference, then you can certainly be in a separate location from your spouse.

What if we hired lawyers?

   Although there are mediators who mediate divorce cases when either or both parties are represented by counsel, I intentionally choose not to work with couples who are represented by lawyers. While I firmly believe that attorneys have a needed place in some divorce cases, I personally believe that it can inhibit the parties from peacefully and efficiently negotiating a fair and amicable resolution in mediation. That being said, if you want to be represented by a lawyer during all or part of the process, that is perfectly fine. However, I will not mediate such cases. If you are currently represented by counsel, I cannot communicate with you. If, at some point, you are not represented by a lawyer, I can discuss the mediation process with you and your spouse.

Who protects the children?

  In a PeacefulSplit® Divorce Mediation, I always hold the best interests of the children paramount. The needs of the child(ren) are addressed and agreements are reached with our assistance. All topics are addressed, such as: shared parental responsibility, visitation, living arrangements, birthdays and holiday scheduling, child support, and all other child-related issues. Mediation can also address details not traditionally handled within the adversarial arena, such as higher education, private schools, car insurance, etc. In mediation, the focus is on the best interests of the children. In the adversarial process, an attorney is obligated to protect the best interests of their client. Sometimes, unfortunately, this is not always consistent with the best interests of the children.

Will mediation work if the parties are angry?

         Generally, the answer is "yes". Most divorces can be resolved using mediation to negotiate a settlement when both parties are committed to resolution and finality. Underlying issues that can interfere with resolution, such as anger, fear and defensiveness, are challenges to the mediation process; however, I am committed to doing whatever is reasonably possibly to help you both put aside such significant negative emotions and feelings and working together towards a peaceful resolution of all issues.

What are the benefits of mediation?

 (1) Significantly reduces the legal costs associated with a contested divorce.           (2) Enhances child/parent relationships.      (3) Maintains privacy.  (4) Creates safety for all parties.               (5) Allows for your control over all decisions and agreements. (6) Reduces stress for all family members.  (7) Fosters consensus building and conflict resolution. (8) Promotes effective communication. (9) Supports and acknowledges the difficult transitions of life events.

Will mediation work if we have a overly complex divorce?

 Yes! There is no simple divorce; they are all complex and personal to the parties involved. I bring a clear step-by-step approach to the resolution of all issues. Ironically, sometimes what seem like the “simple” divorces take longer and are more complicated to resolve amicably than are the “complicated” divorce matters. In the end, it is not the complexity or simplicity of the financial or parenting issues that impedes a successful mediation, but, rather, the lack of commitment on the part of the spouses to focus on the longer-term issues and perspectives.

Can I change my mind?

  Mediation is a voluntary process. My goal is to help guide you and facilitate negotiations to enable you both to resolve all issues needed to create the settlement agreement(s). If, for any reason, you decide during the process and before you sign the settlement document(s) that mediation is not for you, or that you are not comfortable or simply decided to proceed in a different direction, then the mediation is over. In that case, you are back to “square-one” and can proceed with all available options as if you never started mediation. You have absolutely nothing to lose by trying to obtain a PeacefulSplit®. Essentially, its risk-free (except for my fee incurred).

When do we file for divorce?

  The choice of when to file for divorce with the applicable Court is entirely as your discretion. Some couples choose to file for divorce as soon as they have signed the final version of the settlement agreements that I drafted for them. Others choose to wait for weeks or months to actually file (e.g., waiting for a child to finish the school year). Others may choose to wait even longer.

What Is The Difference Between Settlement & Divorce Dates?

        The Settlement Date refers to the date that both spouses have signed and notarized the various settlement agreement(s). 
The Divorce Date refers to the date that the Judge signs the Divorce Decree and you are officially divorced.

What's The Benefit Of  The Settlement Agreements?

    The benefit of completing the mediation process now - even if you do not plan to immediately file for divorce - is having all of the divorce issues (i.e., finances and parenting issues) resolved, finalized and effective as of the Settlement Date.
As of the Settlement Date - even if your divorce date is months later - you will have in place a formal agreement that sets forth, in detail, how your financial life is being divided-up between both spouses and the process and rules for how both of you parent and spend time with your children. 
In general, any assets/debts acquired after the Settlement Date, regardless of the Divorce Date, are the individual property or liability of that spouse only and not considered as marital property.
 This is the biggest advantage of completing mediation now ---- CERTAINTY!.

Example:

What happens if we don't settle all issues?

  Couples often ask me if mediation will end-up being a waste of time if they are unable to resolve EVERY issue. The answer is definitely not. One of mediations unique advantage and benefit is that it's not an "all-or-nothing" process. Of course, my goal is to help every couple resolve every issue facing them in their divorce. However, sometimes, despite the best efforts of all parties, there may be an issue or two that the couple just cannot resolve; they each may have a good-faith disagreement. If that situation were to happen to you, mediation is still productive and helpful. However, in that case, instead of the settlement agreements resolving every issue, they would resolve "almost" every issue. When the couple then files for divorce with the Court, instead of indicating in their court filing that they completed mediation and resolved all issues (which are reflected in the Settlement Agreement(s)), they would advise the court that they resolved almost every issue but need the court/judge to resolve 1 or 2 specific issues that are still in dispute. Thus, the court/judge would then get involved to help the couple resolve those open-issues and the rest of the issues in the divorce would follow according to the Settlement Agreement(s) I drafted for the couple following the mediation sessions.

Is everything just split 50-50?

  The most powerful part of the mediation process is your ability to decide for yourselves exactly in what percentages and in what ways you both want to allocate and divide-up your assets and debts.  For some couples, they will decide a simple 50-50 split.  For most couples that I work with, 50-50 sounds good in theory, but often doesn't take into account each spouse's unique and specific needs. I work with the couple on each issue to decide how it makes sense to them - and not to anyone else. Your needs are always addressed.

Do you help couples anywhere in Florida?

  Absolutely! Regardless of which of the 67 counties in Florida that you reside, I can help you peacefully resolve all of your divorce issues. Read more in the next FAQ about where and how I hold the mediation sessions.

Where are the Mediation Sessions held?

  I conduct mediation sessions either in my private office located in Boca Raton or via a Zoom video session. In the video sessions, each spouse can login remotely, from the same or different locations, via phone or video. There is no difference in the quality of the mediation sessions whether held in-office or via video/phone call-in sessions.

Are video sessions effective?

  The short answer is YES! 
My video mediation sessions are often more effective for some couples than in-person sessions for several key reasons:

• Safety and security of being in the comfort of your own home.
• Not feeling the pressure or uncomfortability of sitting next to your spouse.
  
• Flexibility in scheduling sessions without need to accommodate travel time.
• Ability to take as many breaks whenever you feel it's necessary or desired.

I Fear My Spouse Has Hidden Bank Accounts. 

Is Mediation Transparent?

  Some spouses have concerns that their spouse may hide certain financial information in mediation. This is a valid concern.  Since private mediation is voluntary, there is no formal discovery process to compel the exchange of financial records and information.  However, you can request any document(s) you want from your spouse as a condition of participating in mediation. Both parties do voluntarily complete a list of assets and debts prior to the mediation process beginning which is used by Eric during the mediation session to help the parties negotiate a settlement.

During the mediation sessions, not only is the division of specific bank and financial accounts and debts discussed and agreed upon, but also is the division of general categories of assets and debts. For example, the Settlement Agreement that Eric personally drafts might state that a particular bank account is allocated in a specific manner. It may also provide that ALL bank accounts, regardless if titled in either spouse's name, will be deemed joint property and shared 50%-50%.

This type of language is designed to cover the situation of any "hidden" or "unknown" assets.

Another safety-net built into the process is the Court's general requirement that each spouse prepare and file a Financial Affidavit along with the filing of the divorce papers. It is unlikely that either spouse will choose to withhold or misrepresent financial information and suffer the Judge's serious consequences.

Each spouse completes the Financial Affidavit under the penalty of perjury.

Do you file the divorce papers in Court?

     As a Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Mediator, even though I am also an attorney, I am not permitted to prepare, draft, or complete the actual divorce forms on your behalf. I do provide a sample generic set of forms which give a general idea as to how the forms may look when filled out.
 
From my experience, a large majority of spouses just fill out by themselves the divorce forms found on the Court’s website or by going to the courthouse. It is mostly just filling-in-the-blanks. The most important part is being able to check-off the box on the forms that states you have completed mediation, and then providing the Court with the Settlement Agreement(s) that I drafted for you, and which you and your spouse have signed and notarized. 

For those couples that do not feel comfortable completing the forms themselves, I do provide the name of an attorney who specializes in family law and who can complete the forms for you and provide you with ready-to-file versions of the uncontested divorce forms. For my clients, she offers a very reasonably priced fee to complete the forms (generally under $500).

Mediation is invariably far less expensive than going to court with attorneys and is designed specifically to promote agreement among the both of you and a less painful experience than a contested divorce. 

Do you take sides? Is the process fair?

    As a mediator, I maintain strict neutrality. I never take sides nor tell either spouse that they are “wrong,” “right,” “unreasonable,” “unfair” or any other subjective opinion. I work with the couple to facilitate negotiations – always with the focus that each spouse is the ultimate decision maker. I personally mediate all matters (unlike some other mediators who may “farm-out” the mediation to independent contractors or employees). I make the process as smooth, safe and as trusting as possible. 

Divorce can be scary and uncertain. Divorce can be scary and uncertain. Let Eric from PeacefulSplit® be your guides through this typically arduous process.

How do you handle different cultures?

            Respect for each client’s background, culture, values, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, sexual identity, country of origin, and other unique and important aspects of how each of us self-identify are extremely important to me. My years of education and experiences working with people from diverse backgrounds has instilled in me a high level of honor and sensitivity to the individual needs of people from various backgrounds. I do not judge you nor do I compare your situation or beliefs to anyone else’s. You are unique, and I respect you for being you. Mediation is about creating a process customized to the needs of each specific couple, and I focus on that goal from the very first time we speak and then meet together. If there are any particular needs that you or your spouse have with regard to the mediation process, I welcome your input and openness so that I can try to accommodate you as best as possible.

My spouse called you first. What do I do?

    Often, one spouse contacts me first to inquire about my mediation services. Please understand that regardless of who contacts me first, I do not advocate for either party nor judge one spouse better or worse than the other. I am impartial and pride myself on my professionalism and neutrality. If you have any questions or concerns, or simply want more information, I am ready, willing, and able to speak with you as well. Please feel free to call/email/text me anytime.

Divorce can cost tens of thousands. What's the cost of mediation?

 I completely understand that when you and your spouse are planning for a divorce, finances can be unpredictable. With that in mind, I offer my services for a low flat-rate fee of $2,200.00 – which includes up to ten (10) hours of face-to-face mediation time. You are both under enough stress going through a divorce and the last thing you need during a tense and emotional mediation session is to be constantly looking at your watch to see if you’re going over the next hour and will be charged for another hour of the mediator’s time. I believe you should not have to deal with any surprises about the cost of mediation and that is why I offer a flat-rate fee. Mediation is invariably far less expensive than going to court with attorneys and is designed specifically to promote agreement among the both of you and a less painful experience than a contested divorce.

Why choose your $2,200 flat-fee vs. an hourly rate?

            Eric created a unique video blog answering your questions about the benefits of his $2,200 predictable flat-rate fee. Please click on the link on Page 24 to view the video and read about the benefits of Eric's Flat-Fee pricing.

What's included in the fee?

            I will meet with you both and mediate all the issues necessary to file for an uncontested divorce. The process will include: 
- reviewing your unique circumstances; 
- tailoring the needs to meet individual and collective goals;
- helping to obtain desired outcomes regarding your unique circumstances; 
- facilitating discussions about insurance, taxes, alimony, assets & debts;
- developing a choice of options; 
- formulating and securing negotiations; 
- assisting in the negotiation and division of Assets & Liabilities (Equitable Distribution); and
- aiding in helping you both make decisions regarding Shared Parental Responsibility, Time-Sharing, and all other minor child issues (if there are minor children of the marriage). I also calculate child support obligations.
                                                                                                       Included at no additional charge or fee is: 
- drafting and preparing of the Mediated Marital Settlement Agreement; 
- drafting and preparing of the Parenting Plan and preparing of the Child Support Worksheet (if minor child(ren); 
- telephone and/or email communication throughout the process that is related to scheduling, explanation of the mediation process or other general issues; and providing a sample generic set of filled-out court forms for you to review and use as a guide when you fill-in the Court’s standard set of forms used to file for the uncontested divorce.

Why Eric's Affordable Flat-Fee Is Best For A Peaceful Divorce Process

When couples first contact me, they often ask if my predictable flat-rate fee is beneficial to them or would it be cheaper to just find some mediator who will charge by the hour.

I have been an attorney for 28+ years and, like many attorneys, have often charged clients by the hour for my legal services. What those experiences taught me is that legal services performed based upon an hourly rate almost always produce unpredictable final invoices.  That unpredictability creates anxiety and stress for both client and professional since neither party has certainty as to the outcome of the professional fee.

Click here to watch my VIDEO to learn more about my thoughts about why my affordable flat-rate fee for my  PeacefulSplit® Divorce Mediation service is best for all couples. 

Highlights of  Flat-Rate Fee Benefits

• No Need To Watch The Clock During Mediation Sessions - up to 10-hours are included;
• No Need To Worry About Calling/Emailing/Texting Eric With A Questions Since That's All Included;
• No Need To Worry About The Unpredictable Nature of Professional Services To Get Divorced;
• No Need To Worry About How Long/Slow The Process Is To Draft The Settlement Documents; Since it's a flat-fee, No Need To Worry That many edits or changes will just keep adding to the bill;
• No Need To Worry Your Divorce Costing Tens of Thousand of Dollars;
• No Need To Worry About Unnecessary Uncertainty And Stress About  Getting Divorced;

Eric combines his unique knowledge, experience, and skills as a lawyer with over 28 years experience, a Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Mediator, and as a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, to help couples successfully negotiate resolution to all of the various and complex issues in divorce.

If you are ready to divorce, want to avoid a financially and emotionally draining legal battle, and desire an economical PeacefulSplit®, or just want more information about the divorce mediation process, then Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Mediator, Attorney, and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Eric B. Epstein, Esq., LMFT, is ready to assist you. 

I can be reached by Phone/Text anytime at:
954-272-8292

You can also email me at:
[email protected]